The child in me awakens... One week to go... 7 days..168 hours..10080 minutes...604800 seconds... You get the drift..=)
Like I was writing, The child in me fulminates with the joy of the day looming close.The child that probably isn't ready for the responsibilties that roll along with the day or the implications of the "maturity"(Oh! the blessed proffers..NOT!). But at this point, most of that is piffling and all I seem to be pondering about is the fact that this would be the last birthday spent admist friends.Now, I've done a lot of contemplating about that very fact.Volleyed between whisking myself home or staying put. The latter won.
Many might ask, "What is wrong with you? Go home!", and to them, all I can say is, "Don't want to".
My first Birthday in college, well technically it wasn't in college,but It was definitely unique birthday. My 18th birthday, the day of zapping importance, was on a train,Rockfort Express I think. My friends and I were returning to college from a refreshing vacation at home [Actually it was the homesick holidays =)]. It was definitely something to remember. But I think more than that extremely "eventful" journey, what followed a week after is what made it special. An urgent message from a friend required me to run, yes run!, run long and fast, across half a corridor (=P)
to a room filled with people I just met and hardly knew... who took the effort to make the day count.Planned and wonderfully orchestrated by two of my close friends then, that one day gave me a lot to hope from this hell-hole of a place.That one day carried me through a lot of hard times. A day that told me "You may not have had the dream birthday, but you have them"
Second year was mix of sorts.In every way possible.From friends, to the academia jump, to a new stage of dramaturgy, even to a new image.It was birthday filled with doubts, tears, fears and what not.. The day started out normal.Adorned with enamoured gifts and clothes and a lot of things that I cherish to-date.But something was missing. Infact, my mother had even baked a chocolate cake embellished with M&Ms and sprinkles and sent it across.Yet it didnt feel consummate.It wasn't until the end of the day when I was blindfolded and dragged to my first place of residence and made to face, not one, but two chocolate cakes and a gathering of everyone who made a difference in my life in the thirteen months I had spent in college, the dinner circle,the drama crew and my best friend,THAT was when the spirit of joy paid a visit, with a familiar brush of the previous year...Although That year didn't imprint a cherished birthday,starting out normal and nominal,It ended awesome..always love surprises.. =).Ooh and the cake was salivatingly yummy!!
My 20th birthday was spent at home.Normally, you'd expect the usual get together of friends, cutting a cake that you were probably bored of, and a waffled conversation to follow. Well that was what I expected.And I was partially accurate.My friends did come over.And there was the waffled conversation.....Then, we took a stroll to the beach( which is a five minute walk from home). What I saw there.. was beyond doubt... a very comely surprise. Another set of friends, were gathered in something of a bonfire circle, with four pizza boxes. as a substitue for a fire. Not that I'm complainin that there was no fire! =). My 20th Birthday.. I cut pizzas! ( I think I blew a candle too ;p). A memory still fresh and still brings a wide smile.. very wide. =)..
And here I am.. about to turn 21... as excited as every other birthday... Yet not able to stomach the fact that fours years are almost done..still pondering about the etched memories... Still mulling the last birthday.My last... with friends,who have come to mean so much to me in the past few years..
So,YES, "Don't want to" has been settled on with a lot rumination and reflection but definitely not ruefully..Never ruefully..
And weirdly it doesn't matter anymore if I've had a fall out with some friend or lost touch over a period of time,the very thought that they are here, close and around, satiates my mind with the peace and belief that no matter where we are or what we do , My 21st will always be remembered... just cause ..I have them.. =)
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
24.05.2009..Last few days...
Another year, Another round of slam books, a fresh batch of students,a fresh mickle of tears..Yet this time,there's something different, something that definitely makes me think...think of the myriad of reasons as to why... why this year pricks a lot harder( or pointier :-p) than the last two years..
Maybe its cause i realize that in a year, I'll be the one leaving..Maybe its cause this year has been the hardest.. Maybe its cause this year... well this was the year I found home in a strange land...This was the year,I found my "tribe" :-)
As anyone else,I've had my share of ups and downs...But I've learnt to handle those moments with courage and embrace situations of anguish as another experience..A heapful of people have introduced themselves into my life,made their mark and washed their feet off any obligation to persist. Another hatful,that did stay on,more out of love and care than anything else..Well those are the people who've helped erase any scar in my soul, and every nightmare i've unfortunately chanced upon...
Family away from family.. Not many are lucky enough to experience that feeling.. where you can actually dole out a persona to those around you and appreciate something of a very close knit family thats been created..I was lucky to have Drama.A thought of how can you create a family, from people who want to be someone else,probably arises. But somehow,I think thats what brings you closer.Theatre probably brings out every aspect of you : funny,sad,happy, ecstatic,sick,romantic,loving,caring,hateful,selfish and what not..And your fellow players are the ones that witness all these emotions...Fact is they may not be true..But they might be true as well..so many facets,so many aspects...They accept it..They accept you..just like your family would..Just like your loved one would.. This was the year i got really close to a set of people,consisting of souls literally from every corner of the country,and probably have nothing in common except their love for drama and respect for each other..But there's something else i discovered this year...that we weren't just a collection of individuals, but a single entity that wanted to fashion a melodic theme of friendship and fun..And we did... we whipped up a salad of memories and moments that mean more to us,than a diamond and more precious than platinum :-).
An epitome of jobless talks- This was what i wrote a long time ago, to describe a stage, where i came across someone, an antithesis of myself you could say,but nevertheless became an inherent voice in my life.This voice has been like my conscience for quite some time now,looking out for any pitfall or dark alley I may face..And yet granting me the freedom to explore every road and turning, helping me mould myself into a better person.Someone, who unknowingly guided me out of a very bad phase and threw light on a better life ahead.The whole universe probably knows who I'm talking about(except the person itself... little slow you see :-p) and henceforth I find no reason to mention names... All reasons I find are to just express heartfelt gratitude and amour to this sepharic soul, who had the forebearance to stand by and support all those around.You deserve much more than you get,And I'm sure nothing but happiness is on your way sent from heaven itself to carry you through life with serenity..Tears do dwell up when i think about the fact that i may not be able to see you everyday,but i have every faith that nothing will change between us..Like i've always said,It feels like i've known you for years than months,Maybe because most of the time (atleast these days) i see so much of how i want to be in you...My angel..
Shrek,Sorry i just had to mention you..There's just so much to say and so much more to do..and so little time... From all that you've taught me till that very last play on stage,I always looked up to you with utmost admiration and affection.Three years has been a long journey but that doesn't seem enough.Your life is already drawn with so many instances,but those were just the outlines and soon the colouring will start..and I'm sure you have all the stationery and accessories to make sure it stays within the lines.. :-) Love ya loads shrek!! Stay the same..
There has been so much that has happened in past year..So much that I would love to pen down and maybe read years later to laugh about.. But i guess instances that stand out always deserve a special niche.. a niche carved out just for them..a niche that always be kept safe and warm...
Places change,the weather changes,times change...But how much we change depends on how much we want to change...I've changed...And i love change...
Maybe its cause i realize that in a year, I'll be the one leaving..Maybe its cause this year has been the hardest.. Maybe its cause this year... well this was the year I found home in a strange land...This was the year,I found my "tribe" :-)
As anyone else,I've had my share of ups and downs...But I've learnt to handle those moments with courage and embrace situations of anguish as another experience..A heapful of people have introduced themselves into my life,made their mark and washed their feet off any obligation to persist. Another hatful,that did stay on,more out of love and care than anything else..Well those are the people who've helped erase any scar in my soul, and every nightmare i've unfortunately chanced upon...
Family away from family.. Not many are lucky enough to experience that feeling.. where you can actually dole out a persona to those around you and appreciate something of a very close knit family thats been created..I was lucky to have Drama.A thought of how can you create a family, from people who want to be someone else,probably arises. But somehow,I think thats what brings you closer.Theatre probably brings out every aspect of you : funny,sad,happy, ecstatic,sick,romantic,loving,caring,hateful,selfish and what not..And your fellow players are the ones that witness all these emotions...Fact is they may not be true..But they might be true as well..so many facets,so many aspects...They accept it..They accept you..just like your family would..Just like your loved one would.. This was the year i got really close to a set of people,consisting of souls literally from every corner of the country,and probably have nothing in common except their love for drama and respect for each other..But there's something else i discovered this year...that we weren't just a collection of individuals, but a single entity that wanted to fashion a melodic theme of friendship and fun..And we did... we whipped up a salad of memories and moments that mean more to us,than a diamond and more precious than platinum :-).
An epitome of jobless talks- This was what i wrote a long time ago, to describe a stage, where i came across someone, an antithesis of myself you could say,but nevertheless became an inherent voice in my life.This voice has been like my conscience for quite some time now,looking out for any pitfall or dark alley I may face..And yet granting me the freedom to explore every road and turning, helping me mould myself into a better person.Someone, who unknowingly guided me out of a very bad phase and threw light on a better life ahead.The whole universe probably knows who I'm talking about(except the person itself... little slow you see :-p) and henceforth I find no reason to mention names... All reasons I find are to just express heartfelt gratitude and amour to this sepharic soul, who had the forebearance to stand by and support all those around.You deserve much more than you get,And I'm sure nothing but happiness is on your way sent from heaven itself to carry you through life with serenity..Tears do dwell up when i think about the fact that i may not be able to see you everyday,but i have every faith that nothing will change between us..Like i've always said,It feels like i've known you for years than months,Maybe because most of the time (atleast these days) i see so much of how i want to be in you...My angel..
Shrek,Sorry i just had to mention you..There's just so much to say and so much more to do..and so little time... From all that you've taught me till that very last play on stage,I always looked up to you with utmost admiration and affection.Three years has been a long journey but that doesn't seem enough.Your life is already drawn with so many instances,but those were just the outlines and soon the colouring will start..and I'm sure you have all the stationery and accessories to make sure it stays within the lines.. :-) Love ya loads shrek!! Stay the same..
There has been so much that has happened in past year..So much that I would love to pen down and maybe read years later to laugh about.. But i guess instances that stand out always deserve a special niche.. a niche carved out just for them..a niche that always be kept safe and warm...
Places change,the weather changes,times change...But how much we change depends on how much we want to change...I've changed...And i love change...
When you make new friends in a brand new town
And you start to think about settlin' down
The things that would have been lost on you
Are now clear as a bell
And you find yourself
Yeah that's when you find yourself
Where you go through life
So sure of where you’re headin'
And you wind up lost and it's
The best thing that could have happened
‘Cause sometimes when you lose your way it's really just as well
Because you find yourself
Yeah that’s when you find yourself....
Monday, February 23, 2009
Captain Sprinkleman!!
Its been long since i blessed myself with the privilege
of blogging.... but I suppose i was just waiting for
the right Blog to come along.
I was helping a couple of friends with a junk art
competition.. the theme was SUPERHEROES.We didn't just
create a superhero.. but a scene... and this is how the
story goes..:-
Well the city is called recyclopia... made from
recycled stuff.and somewhere in a village.. there was a
little boy who was outcasted cause he had no talent
like everyone else.He used to be so fascinated with
Harry Potter.. that one day he visited the ministry of
magic to see if there was any magic to give him talent
and yes there was..
But...
The spell had gone wrong..instead he ended up.. as
incendo.. a huge matchbox..
The ministry told him that he can get rid of it.. by
just exhaustin the powers..Which in his case was to
create fire..safely with no harm to others..
Which in his case was to create fire
All he needed was wood...
so he started exhausting it..
But while doing so.. he realized how much power he
had..
and hence...Power corrupted his soul.. and he found a
way to keep his powers..
and decided to take revenge.. on those that outcasted
him.. cuz now he had a talent..
(evil laughter)
so he decided to target the city of recyclopia cuz it
was easily flammable..And he set about doing the same..
Now about the same time when incendo was born.. another
very talented young chap was born in the city of
recyclopia...he had amazing powers.. but he had no
knowledge of why he had them..
And his purpose on earth..it was when incendo came
alive.. that he turned into SPRINKLEMAN!( we even gave
him an underwear with "S" on it lol)
Spinkle man has a sprinkler on one hand and a vaccum
cleaner on the other hand..
He has the abilty to suck up all the ash .. and when he
does.. it goes thru his body.. and all the ash is
converted into a complex polymer which is sprayed out
thru the sprinkler..
Now.. the sprinkled liquid not only extingishes the
flames..
But when it touches the ground it sprouts into grass
within days!!
Hence.. sprinkle man saves the day.. he also has a fire
proof cape made of sand that has been modified to have
the properties of sand but ultra light!!
The villain has to have some pride.. so incendo has a
self destruction method..
Incase he is about to lose...
( ego clash)
To one of his hands there is dynamite.. if he decides
to self destruct.. all he has to do his swing the
dynamite to his shoulders.. and shake shake shake...
(lol) till it lights up... hehe
(since he's a giant matchbox!)
That is the superhero story
We even have a jingle for the hero:
Captain sprinkle!! captain sprinkle!!not single
wrinkle! he turns all the ash.. to lush green grass!!
captain sprinkle!! SET WET GO!!(psshhh) :-p
of blogging.... but I suppose i was just waiting for
the right Blog to come along.
I was helping a couple of friends with a junk art
competition.. the theme was SUPERHEROES.We didn't just
create a superhero.. but a scene... and this is how the
story goes..:-
Well the city is called recyclopia... made from
recycled stuff.and somewhere in a village.. there was a
little boy who was outcasted cause he had no talent
like everyone else.He used to be so fascinated with
Harry Potter.. that one day he visited the ministry of
magic to see if there was any magic to give him talent
and yes there was..
But...
The spell had gone wrong..instead he ended up.. as
incendo.. a huge matchbox..
The ministry told him that he can get rid of it.. by
just exhaustin the powers..Which in his case was to
create fire..safely with no harm to others..
Which in his case was to create fire
All he needed was wood...
so he started exhausting it..
But while doing so.. he realized how much power he
had..
and hence...Power corrupted his soul.. and he found a
way to keep his powers..
and decided to take revenge.. on those that outcasted
him.. cuz now he had a talent..
(evil laughter)
so he decided to target the city of recyclopia cuz it
was easily flammable..And he set about doing the same..
Now about the same time when incendo was born.. another
very talented young chap was born in the city of
recyclopia...he had amazing powers.. but he had no
knowledge of why he had them..
And his purpose on earth..it was when incendo came
alive.. that he turned into SPRINKLEMAN!( we even gave
him an underwear with "S" on it lol)
Spinkle man has a sprinkler on one hand and a vaccum
cleaner on the other hand..
He has the abilty to suck up all the ash .. and when he
does.. it goes thru his body.. and all the ash is
converted into a complex polymer which is sprayed out
thru the sprinkler..
Now.. the sprinkled liquid not only extingishes the
flames..
But when it touches the ground it sprouts into grass
within days!!
Hence.. sprinkle man saves the day.. he also has a fire
proof cape made of sand that has been modified to have
the properties of sand but ultra light!!
The villain has to have some pride.. so incendo has a
self destruction method..
Incase he is about to lose...
( ego clash)
To one of his hands there is dynamite.. if he decides
to self destruct.. all he has to do his swing the
dynamite to his shoulders.. and shake shake shake...
(lol) till it lights up... hehe
(since he's a giant matchbox!)
That is the superhero story
We even have a jingle for the hero:
Captain sprinkle!! captain sprinkle!!not single
wrinkle! he turns all the ash.. to lush green grass!!
captain sprinkle!! SET WET GO!!(psshhh) :-p
Saturday, November 22, 2008
This is me...
I've always been the kind of girl
That hid my face
So afraid to tell the world
What I've got to say
But I have this dream
Right inside of me
I'm gonna let it show, it's time
To let you know
To let you know
This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me
Do you know what it's like
To feel so in the dark
To dream about a life
Where you're the shining star
Even though it seems
Like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
It's the only way
This is real, This is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me
You're the voice I hear inside my head
The reason that I'm singing
I need to find you, I gotta find you
You're the missing piece I need
The song inside of me
I need to find you, I gotta find you
This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me
You're the missing piece I need
The song inside of me (this is me)
You're the voice I hear inside my head
The reason that I'm singing
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me
That hid my face
So afraid to tell the world
What I've got to say
But I have this dream
Right inside of me
I'm gonna let it show, it's time
To let you know
To let you know
This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me
Do you know what it's like
To feel so in the dark
To dream about a life
Where you're the shining star
Even though it seems
Like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
It's the only way
This is real, This is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me
You're the voice I hear inside my head
The reason that I'm singing
I need to find you, I gotta find you
You're the missing piece I need
The song inside of me
I need to find you, I gotta find you
This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light, shine on me
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me
You're the missing piece I need
The song inside of me (this is me)
You're the voice I hear inside my head
The reason that I'm singing
Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me
Sunday, March 23, 2008
A bundle of joy...
Ever noticed how a simple tug of war(with socks) can bring immense joy to your life... But i guess the credit goes more to the opponent of this battle of strength.. My opponent is 2.5 kgs, about 6 inches tall, but has the advantage of being on all fours...
On the other hand.. besides being an excellent active companion.. He also has the cutest smile,the widest yawn,and most adorable ears i have ever seen..not to mention his excellent sense of smell...
He has this addiction to legs and fingers too... all he needs to curl up and doze off is a feet as large as him.. and that ain't too difficult at this point of his life... fingers?? well lets just he likes to play rough... even if it means biting them off... but its all in the game...
He had his most active day yesterday... he felt right at place when we took him to his kingdom... Oh my Prince ruled it all right... from every stone to the highest leaf... he even made the effort to mark his territories.. Now this was an achievement for him considering all this is new to him..
And its amazing how he fits right into the family.. He is the man!
Well if you haven't figured it out by now..I have recently been gifted a little bundle of joy.. A Labrador puppy.. an amazingly cute puppy who I've named Prince Alex( very complicated story why.. lets just settle for ' he responded to it' for now..) .. Prince for short.. and in the two days I've comehome.. I felt the love and care that i never thought i'd feel again... Thankyou lord for bringing some happiness into my life.. hope Prince is blessed with long life.. and May ceaser's soul rest in peace... will always love for what he was to me and will always be.. my hero..
On the other hand.. besides being an excellent active companion.. He also has the cutest smile,the widest yawn,and most adorable ears i have ever seen..not to mention his excellent sense of smell...
He has this addiction to legs and fingers too... all he needs to curl up and doze off is a feet as large as him.. and that ain't too difficult at this point of his life... fingers?? well lets just he likes to play rough... even if it means biting them off... but its all in the game...
He had his most active day yesterday... he felt right at place when we took him to his kingdom... Oh my Prince ruled it all right... from every stone to the highest leaf... he even made the effort to mark his territories.. Now this was an achievement for him considering all this is new to him..
And its amazing how he fits right into the family.. He is the man!
Well if you haven't figured it out by now..I have recently been gifted a little bundle of joy.. A Labrador puppy.. an amazingly cute puppy who I've named Prince Alex( very complicated story why.. lets just settle for ' he responded to it' for now..) .. Prince for short.. and in the two days I've comehome.. I felt the love and care that i never thought i'd feel again... Thankyou lord for bringing some happiness into my life.. hope Prince is blessed with long life.. and May ceaser's soul rest in peace... will always love for what he was to me and will always be.. my hero..
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Someone special...
He seemed to be tensed,
Frantic to finish his work,
All his frustrations fenced,
Between the norms that lurk.
Lines of dismay appeared as a frown,
Beads of efforts seemed to make him drown,
His hands faced the sheets in fear,
The air so fragile with the deadline near.
I wanted to go upto him,
And place my arms around,
Tell him 'Its not end of the world'
And remind him that he isn't duty bound.
But I didn't know how to approach,
Or tread across the thin ice,
I feared breaking a barrier,
A barrier that shouldn't demise
So,I started to retreat,
Still wondering when we could meet,
When I saw him reach behind,
Pulling out his memories of time.
He looked at the stills of life,
which suddenly brought an exuberant smile,
The smile that I longed to see,
The smile that made me believe.
I pondered at the cause of change.
A slight turn left me deranged,
For he was looking at his family,
Something that brought a flutter within me.
It was then I realized the worth,
Of the Largest gestures to the smallest of words,
And At that moment,a familiar feeling,among the rest,stood above.
An urge to tell him,' Dad, you're always loved'.
Frantic to finish his work,
All his frustrations fenced,
Between the norms that lurk.
Lines of dismay appeared as a frown,
Beads of efforts seemed to make him drown,
His hands faced the sheets in fear,
The air so fragile with the deadline near.
I wanted to go upto him,
And place my arms around,
Tell him 'Its not end of the world'
And remind him that he isn't duty bound.
But I didn't know how to approach,
Or tread across the thin ice,
I feared breaking a barrier,
A barrier that shouldn't demise
So,I started to retreat,
Still wondering when we could meet,
When I saw him reach behind,
Pulling out his memories of time.
He looked at the stills of life,
which suddenly brought an exuberant smile,
The smile that I longed to see,
The smile that made me believe.
I pondered at the cause of change.
A slight turn left me deranged,
For he was looking at his family,
Something that brought a flutter within me.
It was then I realized the worth,
Of the Largest gestures to the smallest of words,
And At that moment,a familiar feeling,among the rest,stood above.
An urge to tell him,' Dad, you're always loved'.
Life..
Living in a world of mistakes,
I can see hope in all the fake,
Living to see another day,
Hoping to feel another ray.
The sorrows that bring us down,
The pain in which we drown,
Seem to vanish with a single smile,
Bringing out the happier side.
The irony of life is itself,
Seeking to find light when deaf,
Dreaming about castles in heaven,
All reality and monotony forgotten.
Imagine the world were to stop,
stop at a moment which we despise,
Would we apply all that was taught,
To bring back a life that would suffice.
Thinking and toiling under the cloud
What use is it if we are proud,
Getting Thru'life seems to be our aim,
In the end,satisfied or drained isn't based on the money or fame.
So,move on with your dreams,
Even if they seem bleak,
A day will come to face,
The rewards as beautiful as a clean lake.
I can see hope in all the fake,
Living to see another day,
Hoping to feel another ray.
The sorrows that bring us down,
The pain in which we drown,
Seem to vanish with a single smile,
Bringing out the happier side.
The irony of life is itself,
Seeking to find light when deaf,
Dreaming about castles in heaven,
All reality and monotony forgotten.
Imagine the world were to stop,
stop at a moment which we despise,
Would we apply all that was taught,
To bring back a life that would suffice.
Thinking and toiling under the cloud
What use is it if we are proud,
Getting Thru'life seems to be our aim,
In the end,satisfied or drained isn't based on the money or fame.
So,move on with your dreams,
Even if they seem bleak,
A day will come to face,
The rewards as beautiful as a clean lake.
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