Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Little things do matter...


Noticed when something really bad happens to you, you've got a bunch of people (who mean a lot to you) tell you that it isn't important.. It's just a small thing.. You've got so much more ahead of you.. How will you face that?
Now that feeling of stupidity(of fretting over something unimportant) does dawn upon you with those words.. But don't you think that unless it meant something to you, you wouldn't be feeling bad in the first place? True ain't it?( sorry for the archaic English)
Let's take an example, shall we?

One of my best friends' birthday.....

Before i embark upon this journey to memory land... Let me enlighten you on the finer aspects of this vivid sketch(etched into my gray matter) - We are a group of six... became close one of those very few "educational" tours gifted to us by our school... and close ever since... The years have rolled on since we graduated and moved on to college.. But i suppose we have our ways to keep in touch ( mine is rarely replying or answering calls.. sorry about that guys..but i guess u understand why).. Atleast for me that doesn't change the closeness or how high i hold them in my life...
Suprisingly.. one very small and i suppose insignificant mishap changed that feeling... (now here is where the story starts..)...

One of my best friends' birthday.... we always wish each other and send cards or sometimes even gifts.. This year wasn't any different in that aspect.. What was different was that, this year, she decided to publicize our efforts...unfortunately... (this was what i heard) while putting up something my friends had sent her from chennai.. She felt tired and postponed mine to the next day...
I guess the more unfortunate thing for her was that orkut has updates.. so i noticed her updated album.. And well i frankly was hurt ( I did not know about the reasons and from what i know of the girl in question.. she never postpones)...

Someone close told me that it didn't matter.. As long as you were happy with what you gave her and she thanked you for it.. Its nothing to be depressed about.. I nodded and agreed.. But as for anyone, that twinge still remained.. The feeling that maybe my way of keeping in touch was actually the cause for all this.. Something so simple caused a lot of grief...
Things are settled now.. Almost.. i still feel left out.. but I've learnt to live with it... not accept it.. but move on... i can always weave my way back in.. but in due time i suppose.. the healer( my ingenious brain :P) needs its sidekick ( my heart) to be healed first... ( so its an internal task first.. he he)

I guess you got my point... little things do matter... Like for instance.. The 13th of every month... NO NO... Not as an omen.. This day is actually "our gang day". Childish as it may seem... and saddening that we need a day to make it a point to talk to each other.. atleast we make the effort... because well.. from my side.. they still are important to me.. after all i did have the best moments of my life with my pack of six( sounds like beer cans doesn't it.. lol).. they are still the people i'd run to when i was in trouble and i couldn't tell my parents.. or my latest crush.. or a high score in a subject or even if i want to scream at someone.. Because I know they'll understand, they'll listen and they will understand.. help out if they could...they will be there for me, like they have before....
And just like i will be there for them too.. always..
Cheers you guys!
Happy thirteenth!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

i knew it too well (even before readin this blog) that it hurt you a
lot and i understand it very well .i am giving you no justifications and i am not even expecting
you to believe me when i say that would have put the photo the very next
cause it meant a lot to me and not because i thought you felt bad and therefore
"had" to add the photo. but whatever lady,OMG i dont know what made you feel the
need to "MOVE ON" or "WEAVE BACK YOUR WAY IN"!!!!!.never knew one big time blunder could
wipe away everything you ever did to show that you care.see,dont we understand that we mean a lot to u
even when you hardly stay in touch( though sparing 60 seconds from your schedule will help a lot :P)..you cant let a 24 hour delayed upload of
orkut photo make you feel "left out"!( i m still alive you know!)
On the brighter side of it,..quoting your own words,i do think that unless it meant something to you, you wouldn't be feeling bad in the first place!"
i ll make sure i never give you another opportunity to make you feel this way.
belated happy thirteenth!
P.s.1-"HEYYY" it is not kiddish to celebrated happy thirteenth! i jus think it is beyond normal and boring human comprehension ;)
p.s.2: something tells me i should ve posted this as a mail to your account and not as a comment..errr it does seem a bit long
-cluelessgal