The child in me awakens... One week to go... 7 days..168 hours..10080 minutes...604800 seconds... You get the drift..=)
Like I was writing, The child in me fulminates with the joy of the day looming close.The child that probably isn't ready for the responsibilties that roll along with the day or the implications of the "maturity"(Oh! the blessed proffers..NOT!). But at this point, most of that is piffling and all I seem to be pondering about is the fact that this would be the last birthday spent admist friends.Now, I've done a lot of contemplating about that very fact.Volleyed between whisking myself home or staying put. The latter won.
Many might ask, "What is wrong with you? Go home!", and to them, all I can say is, "Don't want to".
My first Birthday in college, well technically it wasn't in college,but It was definitely unique birthday. My 18th birthday, the day of zapping importance, was on a train,Rockfort Express I think. My friends and I were returning to college from a refreshing vacation at home [Actually it was the homesick holidays =)]. It was definitely something to remember. But I think more than that extremely "eventful" journey, what followed a week after is what made it special. An urgent message from a friend required me to run, yes run!, run long and fast, across half a corridor (=P)
to a room filled with people I just met and hardly knew... who took the effort to make the day count.Planned and wonderfully orchestrated by two of my close friends then, that one day gave me a lot to hope from this hell-hole of a place.That one day carried me through a lot of hard times. A day that told me "You may not have had the dream birthday, but you have them"
Second year was mix of sorts.In every way possible.From friends, to the academia jump, to a new stage of dramaturgy, even to a new image.It was birthday filled with doubts, tears, fears and what not.. The day started out normal.Adorned with enamoured gifts and clothes and a lot of things that I cherish to-date.But something was missing. Infact, my mother had even baked a chocolate cake embellished with M&Ms and sprinkles and sent it across.Yet it didnt feel consummate.It wasn't until the end of the day when I was blindfolded and dragged to my first place of residence and made to face, not one, but two chocolate cakes and a gathering of everyone who made a difference in my life in the thirteen months I had spent in college, the dinner circle,the drama crew and my best friend,THAT was when the spirit of joy paid a visit, with a familiar brush of the previous year...Although That year didn't imprint a cherished birthday,starting out normal and nominal,It ended awesome..always love surprises.. =).Ooh and the cake was salivatingly yummy!!
My 20th birthday was spent at home.Normally, you'd expect the usual get together of friends, cutting a cake that you were probably bored of, and a waffled conversation to follow. Well that was what I expected.And I was partially accurate.My friends did come over.And there was the waffled conversation.....Then, we took a stroll to the beach( which is a five minute walk from home). What I saw there.. was beyond doubt... a very comely surprise. Another set of friends, were gathered in something of a bonfire circle, with four pizza boxes. as a substitue for a fire. Not that I'm complainin that there was no fire! =). My 20th Birthday.. I cut pizzas! ( I think I blew a candle too ;p). A memory still fresh and still brings a wide smile.. very wide. =)..
And here I am.. about to turn 21... as excited as every other birthday... Yet not able to stomach the fact that fours years are almost done..still pondering about the etched memories... Still mulling the last birthday.My last... with friends,who have come to mean so much to me in the past few years..
So,YES, "Don't want to" has been settled on with a lot rumination and reflection but definitely not ruefully..Never ruefully..
And weirdly it doesn't matter anymore if I've had a fall out with some friend or lost touch over a period of time,the very thought that they are here, close and around, satiates my mind with the peace and belief that no matter where we are or what we do , My 21st will always be remembered... just cause ..I have them.. =)
